A relationship with a narcissist is a one-sided struggle because narcissists choose partners for only them.
How many times have you thought about your partner’s personality before you actually started dating him or her? And even after you’ve decided you’re “in love,” have you considered if he or she has the traits that would make him or her a great long-term partner?
This was certainly true for me. I knew that my ex had a narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) and was capable of being very controlling, but did not expect him to turn out to be such an incredible lover. He had all of the traits and characteristics of someone with NPD, and none of the ones that could have prepared me for the relationship to end.
It was a shock to my system when I discovered that he was a narcissist and how it played out in our relationship. It’s easy to say that narcissists are self-absorbed and lack empathy, but those are actually just a few of the traits they possess.
Some narcissists may not show obvious signs of the disorder, but they are still in denial about their actions and behaviors. They are so focused on their own needs, they can often be oblivious to other people’s feelings. This lack of emotional awareness makes it even harder to recognize when a narcissist is in a relationship. Narcissists don’t realize what they’re doing and may convince themselves that they are acting appropriately and that everything is fine.
The relationship is a game of cat and mouse for them since they believe that they are always right.
Narcissists can have an intense sense of entitlement, believing that life should be tailored to suit their needs. They want everything to be perfect and are often quick to point out the ways in which others are wrong or don’t understand. They can have difficulty recognizing or admitting when they are wrong and may even blame their partners for making things difficult.
Narcissists do have high expectations of themselves and of others. They also have a very low tolerance for criticism, which leads to a constant need for reassurance from their partner. They want to be treated as superior and feel entitled to special treatment. Their inflated self-esteem can lead to arrogance, which is very off-putting to their partners. Narcissists are also very jealous and will have a tendency to make fun of their partners and criticize them.
This can be seen as a form of rejection and can lead to feelings of insecurity. Narcissists also tend to be controlling, since they believe that they should be in charge. When it comes to money and possessions, narcissists often want to be the one who makes all of the decisions. They may have unrealistic expectations of how much they can spend or earn.
Narcissists are often self-absorbed, but can also be very cold. They are self-focused and don’t easily show their emotions. They often use charm as a way to get their way. Their behavior can make others uncomfortable and feel anxious.
The narcissist’s lack of empathy can make him or her believe that everyone wants what they have and that no one is on his or her side. Narcissists rarely empathize and feel responsible for other people’s feelings, which makes them hard to work with. They also lack empathy for other people’s problems and are easily bored when it comes to making new friends. Narcissists lack compassion for others and see themselves as superior, even if their actions are contrary to their beliefs.
Although narcissists have a lack self-awareness, they don’t always acknowledge their behaviors. Narcissists may deny that they have any psychological problems or that their partners are unhappy. They can be convincing, but their excuses may not ring true with those around them. They are often very critical and often say one thing while doing another.
Narcissists often have a distorted view of relationships, since they think they should be treated differently than anyone else. They believe that they should always be the center of attention and that others shouldn’t expect too much from them.
Narcissists need to feel important and special, and will often overreact if they don’t feel that way. If they are in a relationship that doesn’t meet their needs, they are quick to cut off communication and isolate themselves.
Narcissists can become very insecure if they aren’t being treated the way they want. When someone doesn’t recognize their superiority or provide enough attention and appreciation, narcissists often turn on themselves.
They will find faults with their appearance or personality and begin to believe that they are inferior. This causes them to lash out at their partners or become passive-aggressive.
They may even become jealous or angry, which is the main reason that narcissists often get into relationships. They are afraid that they will lose the special attention they get from their partners.
When narcissists become involved in a relationship, they tend to expect to be the center of attention. They don’t like to share their partners with anyone else.
They want to be the only one that their partner sees and talks to. Narcissists are often highly self-centered and expect that their partners will give them the same attention that they give their own partners.
They believe that they deserve more and that their partners should be obligated to give them what they want. They often complain that their partners don’t pay enough attention to them or that they don’t do enough for them. They don’t understand why their partners don’t treat them the way they want to be treated.
Narcissists are usually unable to empathize with their partners. They believe that their partners are beneath them and that they are better than everyone else.
Narcissists are very insecure and are afraid of being replaced by their partners. They may also feel like their partner is out to get them, and they may act out to get attention.
If you’re in a relationship with a narcissist, you may have a hard time understanding what they are saying. They will say one thing but do another. Narcissists are quick to act out, and they are very critical of their partners. They may even be manipulative. They may call you names, and blame you for things that are your fault.
They may even try to control your emotions. They may use emotional blackmail and threats. They may use sarcasm and passive-aggressiveness. Narcissists may even lie to you, and makeup stories about how they are the victim. Narcissists often have a lack of empathy and may only show compassion when they feel that they are in danger.